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[THIS IS A MESS, MIKA IS NOT ALLOWED TO PUBLISH WHEN MYLES IS DISTRACTED]

THIS IS MAGICAL, MIKA IS ALLOWED TO PUBLISH WHEN MYLES IS DEAD

Our writing is for Millennials and Zoomers. It’s not for you.1 Did the music choices not make that clear?

The things I talk about are the things we talk about. You just have zero idea what we talk about. Our culture exists nearly independently of yours. You don’t understand where we get our news,2 where we communicate with each other,3 or what matters to us.4 

Can’t you feel the sands shifting beneath your feet?

I stay out too late

Got nothing in my brain

And yeah, sometimes we express significant bitterness towards your generations for, basically the first time in American history, leaving your descendants with a weaker country full of crumbling infrastructure in a world that is literally burning to death and you’re still doing JACK SHIT.5

That's what people say, mm, mm

That's what people say, mm, mm

Ok, that got away from us. Can you feel the bitterness? Yeah, every Millennial and Zoomer feels that way. We learned American history, same as you, and we see the historically shitty deal we’re getting.6 

I go on too many dates

But I can't make 'em stay

We talk about our life. Maybe you guys don’t have friends the way we do, but that’s all we’re doing. We’re telling the same stories I would tell my friends. We’re just writing them down and sharing them. Some of those stories will be cute. Some of those stories will be crude. Some of them will be risque. And some of them will be downright ridiculous.

At least that's what people say, mm, mm

That's what people say, mm, mm

But they’re our stories, and it’s our decision to share them. Writing and sharing them is therapeutic. I’m genuinely unable to talk about some of these things in person.

But I keep cruisin'

Can't stop, won't stop movin'

The way I talk about things is also the way we talk about things.

It's like I got this music in my mind

Sayin' it's gonna be alright

It’s funny how many drops we got from the I Ain’t Got Nuffin post last week (also the most subscribes we’ve gotten in a single day). Basically a lot of PC police feedback and “too crude for me”.7

I never miss a beat

I'm lightnin' on my feet

And I was like, these are jokes. Maybe you’d be less uptight if you had POC friends?

And then you’re like, “Myles, you have POC friends?”

And that's what they don't see, mmm-mmm

That's what they don't see, mmm-mmm

And we’re like, are you kidding?

Let’s start with the basics:

  1. Discord: we play videogames with people all over the world, and we hang out, play, chat and shoot the breeze whenever we have time. On weekdays we stream DOTA 2 with a bunch of black and east asian guys from Long Breach. On weekends we play with a bunch of brits and CIS-ers. Oh and we sometimes play with a Delaware group that has a lot of Southeast Asians.

  2. Demographics: Our generations are way more diverse than you, and our culture is an amalgam of dozens of cultures you don’t participate in in any way.8 []

[]

Do you get my point? Just because your life is lily white doesn’t mean ours is.

I’ve never cared what color or creed my friends are, and so we have friends of every color and creed. Most of us do.

I'm dancin' on my own (Dancin' on my own)

I make the moves up as I go (Moves up as I go)

If you’re too uptight to enjoy the joke, then unsubscribe. It’s literally at the bottom of the email. If we could draw an arrow we would.

And that's what they don't know, mmm-mmm

That's what they don't know, mmm-mmm

and honestly, we’re gonna drop into discord speak more. im easin us into the long term purpose of this substack. our demo is millennials and zoomers and that’s exactly who we want to reach

The things we write, even and sometimes especially the things we wrote while manic, are pieces written for them. They get it.

You don’t. And we don’t expect you to. How could You?

And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate

(Haters gonna hate)

Baby, I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake

I shake it off, I shake it off (Ha!)

And yeah, we talk about gender and sexual identities (and sex) more. Puritanism is dying a long overdue death.

ps: if you’re a partner at a law firm reading this, it’s because we put you on the list while we were manic. associates are our demo. if you wanna keep reading, cool

pps: …what makes you think we weren’t writing somewhere else the past year?