life is a masquerade

our masquerade

we wear different masks with our family, our friends, our colleagues, at church, online and in our sex lives. this is a fundamental truth1

some masks form naturally over our lifetime. some are constructed (eg biz dev, public figures).2 some we wear publicly and some we hide from everyone (eg kinks or gender issues)

so who are you? which mask is You?

a companion piece to I’m Myles, She’s Mika

you, a person, are more than the masks you wear

honest answer is “none of them”.4 no mask fits perfectly

better question: do your masks collectively express your personhood?

if not, do something. forget fear and judgment; build your own masks

life is ephemeral. all we have are our experiences, stories and legacies. we dont want to go to our grave wondering who we could have been, when we can BE right now5

play the roles you wantor live knowing you arent expressing your full personhood

on identity

identity is a strange concept. what defines a persons identity? we think there are two poles colliding

1. you are defined by the collective understanding of the people who know you; and

2. you are defined by yourself, by self-determination

these poles operate simultaneously; engaging with humanity creates social expectations,6 but all of us “believe” in self-determination

ive found that older generations have narrow views of the range of masks a person can wear and weaker belief in self-determination

younger generations are the opposite; exploration of identity is almost a generational touchstone of zoomers. and we accept people with non-binary or fluid identities far more readily

we have it right. we just do. people should be able to wear the masks that express their personhood

thanks for reading my “first” solo piece7

Or, you can dive deeper: